The jig is up

My dearest readers,

I am not who you think I am.

I am not the champion of equality you’d once been sold.

I am not Miss Independent, nor Miss Self-Sufficient, nor Miss Keep Your Distance.

When I bought Andrew an Apple Watch and a lavish Italian dinner in Soho, I was not flexing out of pure love for my man, though do know there’s no shortage of that.

I have ke…