I have exciting news to share: You can now read Broke But Moisturized in the new Substack app for iPhone.
With the app, you’ll have a dedicated Inbox for my Substack and any others you subscribe to. New posts will never get lost in your email filters, or stuck in spam. Longer posts will never cut-off by your email app.
Currently Watching: The Andy Warhol Diaries on Netflix. I’m three episodes in and fully captivated. Not only is it beautifully done—the AI-generated narration in Warhol’s voice is a cool (albeit morbid) touch—but the story is so compelling. Here was this fairly dull guy, an immigrant from a poor family in Pittsburgh whose art changed the world and drove the culture on multiple fronts. Warhol was mad for the American paradigm of reinventing oneself, for beauty and sex and WASPy-ness. It’s also a cautionary tale of the loneliness that still hums beneath fame and power. What I’m saying is go watch it.
Listening to: The new Call her Daddy mini episode on friendship with Mel Robbins. I don’t know who Mel Robbins is nor do I really care to, but this touched on a lot of friendship subtopics I’ve been contemplating: the womanly pressure to be part of a “girl gang;” friendships driven by insecurity; how proximity determines our relationships; etc. Remember when Kylie Jenner called 2016 “the year of realizing stuff?” (profound!) I think that was a bit of 2022 prophecy, i.e, I see, in my crystal ball, many a relationship shift for us this year.
Just Purchased: Ariana Grande’s “Cloud” perfume. I’d heard it was a decent dupe for Baccarat Rouge 540, which was confirmed by three people with both fragrances via my Instagram story. But because trusting hearsay is boring and facile, I turned to the folks who know shit about shit. Like, this piece from Fragrantica blew my mind. The language people use to dissect fragrance! Pure elegance. I know nothing about perfume, but to me, Cloud is a yummy, candy-like scent. It makes me feel youthful and hot in a “girl you hooked up with on your family vacation to the Outer Banks in 9th grade whose sweet scent will stay with you forever” kind of way. It’s nice to have something playful in the mix. I’ll still never give up my daily driver, Narciso Rodriguez “For Her.”
Loving: Croissants. I’ve now shared three “croissants of the day” on Instagram wherein I load them up with toppings like prosciutto, ricotta, za’atar, and pepitas. I have a childlike need for everyday rebellion. Food is central to my self-expression, so croissants are a perfect tool. They’re rich and buttery and completely obliterate the Wellness Industrial Complex standards of nourishment. Not to get too deep (I’m lying), but since capitalism has destroyed the middle class and the only normal people with hope for upward mobility are like, fucking viral YouTubers, it’s nice to assign luxury to something as accessible as a 4-pack of flaky bread from the Whole Foods bakery. Basically we’ll never have savings accounts or buy homes or have kids but we can have a croissant and pray for an asteroid.
Feeling: Renewed after last night’s dinner party. Remember when I lived with three strange men for a good chunk of 2020? We get the quarantine gang together every few months and it’s always special. Keenan’s apartment is a global house DJ oasis. There are plants everywhere and rare vinyl galore and we had veggie lasagna and brut rosé on floor cushions while The Mudd Show streamed. It reminded me how much I appreciate people who commit to curating their space; it makes such a difference in the feeling your guests take with them when they leave. Keenan also dates this magical Georgian fairy whose free-spirited energy and thick Eastern European accent make you feel like you’re somewhere way more exotic than North Philly.
Thinking: About my New Year’s resolution, which was to not take things personally. This is probably my first fruitful resolution, maybe because it’s my first incorporeal one (past examples include: learning how to roll a nice joint; gaining the flexibility to do a split). I have been painfully sensitive since childhood. It doesn’t help that I’m susceptible to patterns of rumination and seeing the glass half empty, i.e., when someone hurts my feelings, I will dwell on it and assume they hate me. This year’s resolution has been particularly useful in entering the corporate world. Projects move a million miles an hour and people don’t have time to think about how “Thanks.” sounds different than “Thanks!” in an email.
It’s crazy how modernity is just a continuous tidal wave of opportunities to take things personally. You log on Twitter and see a different opinion than your own, just begging you to sink your teeth in and prove them wrong. And for what? Spiked cortisol and a wasted 20 minutes? Life hack: you can’t take the bait if you presume nothing is bait, that everyone is operating from a tiny brain-village where they are mayor, and their perspective has nothing to do with you. Bliss.
Recent Work: If you haven’t read last week’s confessional on serial monogamy and fractured identity, what are you waiting for?
Reminder: March is slipping through our fingers and it’ll soon be time for the second edition of Ask BBM advice column. Get your questions in on brokebutmoisturized.com and I’ll round up a couple before the month ends. Topic prompts: body image, complicated love, kink shame, etc. I’m a little biased, but it’s cathartic to vent to someone anonymously who won’t judge you. *wink*
Not taking things personally is a continuous lesson to learn. And it’s one you have to teach other people because their volatility can affect you! It took me many years and even now, I have to apply it everywhere. You start to realize how emotional and egotistical people are.
Croissants! I like a tuna salad one or steak and cheese. Noms.
Have to check out how that website describes perfume. I’m always looking for new ways to talk about senses.